NO Television for My Birthday Ride, but I Rode Anyway

John Merrow Uncategorized

3PM, Monday, June 8:  This morning was a perfect day for my birthday ride, so I called ESPN to discuss plans for live-streaming on ESPN-27, the channel devoted to amateur athletes.  I recorded the conversation.

ESPN:  Good morning, ESPN. How may I help you?

ME: May I speak to the Executive Producer at your ESPN-27 Channel please? I’m calling about the live-streaming of my attempt to bike my age.

ESPN: There is no ESPN-27 channel. We have ESPN, ESPN-2, and ESPN-3. That’s it.l

ME: But I was told……

ESPN: Sir, there’s no such channel.  You’ve been tricked.

ME: Then perhaps ESPN would be interested in live-streaming my effort on ESPN-3.  I know you are desperate for live sporting events.

ESPN: I don’t think we’re that desperate, sir.

ME: It might draw an audience. After all, my effort is sanctioned by ABBA.

ESPN: What? A musical group is sanctioning athletic events?

ME: No, ABBA is the Association of Birthday Bikers Athletes. It’s in Sweden. Nothing to do with music.

ESPN: Would you mind holding for a minute, sir?

(A minute or more passes)

ESPN: Sir, I’m afraid someone is pulling your leg. There is no ‘Annual Birthday Bikers Association.’  There is ABBA, the Swedish pop supergroup that’s world famous for songs like ‘Dancing Queen.’  Sir, you need to get out more often.  Thank you for calling ESPN.

(She concludes the call)

Well, it turns out that she was correct. Apparently ABBA is/are some singers in Sweden, kind of like The Weavers, The Kingston Trio, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, Peter, Paul & Mary, or the Yale Glee Club.  Who knew?

Someone tricked me about ABBA and ESPN-27.  I owe you an apology, because what I told you last week about riding with a Target logo on my back, wearing Depends for Men bike pants, and being pumped up by Vacurect (my tires) was false.  

Lucky for me, Vin Scully, Al Michaels, Tony Kornheiser, and the other famous sports announcers hadn’t yet responded to my invitation to get involved in the live-streaming. It would have been embarrassing to have to let them down.  I guess they were waiting until my actual birthday, June 14th, got closer to accept my invitation.

But yesterday was a perfect day for biking, and so I rode anyway…

IMG_2057

As you can see, I added an extra mile for good measure.  So, friends, please write your checks for $80, $800, $8,000 or some other multiple of 80 in support of organizations in minority communities affected by the pandemic and the murder of George Floyd.

Once again, I apologize for misleading you about ABBA.  I’m thinking it’s a good idea to have an organization of birthday riders, but it needs a different name.  Maybe Birthday Athletes Biking Annually?

Stay safe….

 

10 thoughts on “NO Television for My Birthday Ride, but I Rode Anyway”

  1. 🙄

    > Karen Hein MD > PO Box 607 > 1234 Maple Hill Lane > Jacksonville, VT 05342 > 802 368-7568 > > NYC (part time) > Hudson View Gardens D63 > 116 Pinehurst Ave > NY, NY 10033 > 917 856-3894 > > Rebecca Solnit defined walking as “a state in which the mind, the body, and the world are aligned,”

    >

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  2. John, thanks very much for your humor and commitment to a more just and equitable work. As you may know, the intersection where Mr. Floyd was murdered is about a 10 minute drive from our home.

    JoAnn and I, our children and some of our grandchildren, have been actively involved in in the last 2 weeks in demonstrations, marches, financial and other contributions to a number of groups working with folks who have been affected by the pandemic and the murder.

    Unquestionably this is a time when people of good will must stand up.

    Here’a a link to a newspaper column I wrote about an pandemic related injustice in Mn – the state requires unemployment contributions on behalf of high school youth who are working. But it is refusing to give unemployment insurance payments to high school youth. Many of them are students of color from low income families. Their earnings help pay basic household expenses and rent.

    https://www.hometownsource.com/morrison_county_record/free/giving-student-workers-what-they-ve-earned/article_7dc02f62-a747-11ea-8010-0f2c0ee1aa4f.html

    I’m working closely with a statewide coalition of youth and adults who are trying to change this. Hope we make progress on this and many other issues.

    Thanks again for your decades of leadership.
    Sincerely
    Joe Nathan, Director Center for School Change
    Resident of St Paul, Mn

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

      • Thanks for asking, John. Here’s a link to a newspaper column that answers your question:
        https://www.startribune.com/need-help-want-to-help-twin-cities-groups-offer-resources-for-folks-hurt-by-riots/570894392/

        If you go to the actual article, it will have imbedded links. LOTS of ways to help.

        Thanks again.
        Joe

        The second half of the article that offers suggestions re with cash donations.

        ” Need help? Want to help? Twin Cities groups offer resources for folks hurt by riots
        Groups are gathering donations and planning clean up events this week.
        Twin Cities nonprofits, community organizations and churches are gathering donations and coordinating cleanup efforts in areas damaged by the rioting that has followed the death of George Floyd in police custody on Memorial Day.

        Here are some resources for those looking to volunteer or who are in need of assistance. Scheduled events have been in flux, check the linked webpages for updates.

        Donate food or other supplies:

        • Nokomis Chiropractic and Wellness at 5313 Lyndale Ave. S. in Minneapolis is gathering donations Monday through Friday from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.

        •The Coven is collecting nonperishable food, household and cleaning goods and other items this week from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. at Aria, located at 105 N. 1st St., Minneapolis.

        • Venn Brewing is collecting donations including nonperishable food, hygiene products, diapers and baby formula. The brewery at 3550 E. 46th St. in Minneapolis will accept donations from 4 p.m. to 8 p.m. Wednesday through Friday and noon until 6 p.m. Saturday and Sunday.

        • YWCA Minneapolis created a distribution hub for groceries, hygiene items and other supplies at 2121 E. Lake St., Minneapolis. People can pick up goods every Wednesday and Saturday from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. and the YWCA is collecting donations at the location on Tuesdays and Fridays during the same time frame. Volunteers are needed.

        • Mixed Blood Theatre Company is offering a food pantry from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Monday through Friday at 1501 S. 4th St., Minneapolis. People seeking food or supplies can stop by during those hours, and donations can also be made during that time. Those who would like to volunteer to help operate the pantry or deliver to locations in Cedar Riverside can sign up here.

        • The Boys & Girls Clubs of the Twin Cities, which has a club a block from 38th and Chicago that has turned into a food distribution site, is accepting donations for food, toiletries and other items for Minneapolis families. To donate, contact Mark Graves at mgraves@bgc-tc.org or Tony Arnold at tarnold@bgc-tc.org. To volunteer to help, contact Molly Hemes mhemes@bgc-tc.org. Make a financial donation at their website.

        • People & Pets Together is looking for donations to help south Minneapolis families feed and care for their pets. Pet food or cat litter can be left in the parking lot drop-box behind the People & Pets Together pet food shelf, at 3745 Bloomington Ave. in Minneapolis.

        • Support the Cities is asking people to sign up as drivers to deliver supplies to those in need. More details available on their Facebook page.

        • For those looking to get or give food, Hunger Solutions also offers a map of food shelf locations and hours across all of Minnesota.

        • Community organizers have compiled more details on aid and events here.

        Donate money:

        • West Broadway Business and Area Coalition is partnering with the Northside Funders Group to gather donations for businesses in Minneapolis’ Northside impacted by the uprising and by COVID-19.

        • The Lake Street Council in Minneapolis is collecting donations to support small businesses and nonprofits that need to rebuild. Donations can be made on their website.

        • In St. Paul, the Neighbors United Funding Collaborative is similarly raising money to help businesses rebuild.

        • Another fundraiser for businesses in St. Paul’s Midway neighborhood and other areas is being organized by the St. Paul Area Chamber of Commerce Charitable Foundation.

        • The Asian Economic Development Association has created a GoFundMe account to help Asian American-owned businesses that were damaged during the unrest.

        • African Economic Development Solutions has also created an account to raise money to support local African immigrant businesses.

        • The Little Earth Residents Association is temporarily halting accepting food and supply donations due to the overwhelming response, but is accepting financial donations.

        • Midtown Global Market is raising funds to repair damage and support small businesses in the community. People can get more details on donating here.

        • The Longfellow Community Council is fundraising to support food banks, help businesses rebuild and boost safety such as installing outdoor lighting, removing graffiti and buying reflective vests for neighborhood walks.

        Help clean up (people are encouraged to bring brooms, trash bags, work gloves and masks):

        • Support the Cities has been assessing where clean up efforts are needed and sharing that information on its Facebook page.

        Jessie Van Berkel writes about Minnesota government and politics at the Star Tribune. She previously covered St. Paul City Hall and local government in the south metro.

        Like

  3. Ha, ha, ha! Good one, John! And big congrats for biking your age, plus 1 year!! I will send an $80 donation in your name to a local organization I support – probably Harvest House. I think BABA is perfect: “Bah, Bah” black sheep and all that! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! (almost)

    John Merrow posted: “3PM, Monday, June 8: This morning was a perfect day for my birthday ride, so I called ESPN to discuss plans for live-streaming on ESPN-27, the channel devoted to amateur athletes. I recorded the conversation. ESPN: Good morning, ESPN. How may I help y”

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  4. Congratulations, John!!! Way to go. It certainly was the perfect day. Sorry you had trouble with the tech component. We are searching for the right donee. Will let you know when we make our donation. Thanks for riding. You are an inspiration.

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  5. Having never heard of ABBA or been fan of ABBA, I waited to verify. Congrats. I hoped you included Gelato in Vineyard Haven among your seven stops. I contributed $80 to a new education program worthy of your name — scholarships for low-income kids to study astronomy with a professor at Evergreen Valley College in San Jose.

    Like

    Reply

Leave a comment